[ it's taken days to gather up the courage to open up Cullen's contact, days since her revival berating herself over the things she said to him. he'd been right. they'd all been right.
it's not an easy pill to swallow. ]
I'm sorry, Cullen. [ there's really nothing else to say. she has no excuses to give him as there are no excuses for her actions. ]
[ if things had been different--if he'd been affected especially negatively by what she had done, or if she was texting him on another day--maybe he'd be angry at her. right now, he's just tired. ]
I don't deserve that, you know. [ she doesn't really want it, either, far more interested in wallowing in her own guilt than receiving forgiveness. ] Fear sent me a gift for what I did.
That's kind of the understatement of the century. He's the most colossal dickbag, and I'd really like to see him skinned, and dropped in a vat of acid.
[ or whatever the godly equivalent may be to cause similar pain. ]
Yeah. I'm not going to lie and say I still don't worry about them, they still react to my emotions, and when you consider this place is basically torture-cave-city, I'm still a danger even if I don't want to be.
All it takes is one asshole saying the wrong thing, I get upset, and they get crispy.
[ and when you consider people are a wee bit upset with her :| ]
If it's control that's hard for you, I may be able to help teach you a little. I don't have magic myself, but most templar abilities are based in willpower and the control thereof.
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it's not an easy pill to swallow. ]
I'm sorry, Cullen. [ there's really nothing else to say. she has no excuses to give him as there are no excuses for her actions. ]
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I forgive you.
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Fear is an asshole.
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[ or whatever the godly equivalent may be to cause similar pain. ]
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[ skin him and drop him in acid, he means. ]
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[ it's kind of a joke. l o l ]
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Were those the magical abilities you were worried about before?
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All it takes is one asshole saying the wrong thing, I get upset, and they get crispy.
[ and when you consider people are a wee bit upset with her :| ]
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[ or cancel them out? she's a bit ??? about templars and magic and all that fun stuff. ]
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[ ... hypothetically anyway. ]
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[ translation: she is free whenever. just, you know, not wherever. comes with the territory of majorly fucking up. ]
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Where and when would you like to meet?